It's Time of Year Again......New Year Resolution or Not

OK well I decided a long time ago that I really don't believe in New Year Resolutions. I still don't as far as the usual ones like.....losing weight, not smoking (thank goodness I never needed that one), stopping drinking (this one either) etc. Really! Think about it, what makes us think that if year after year we can't follow through with the same 'ole resolutions, this year would be any different. Don't get me wrong if you have a strong enough will you may have followed through but, I know myself and yeah isn't gonna happen! Why promise myself I'm going to do something when I know in the end I'm going to break that promise?

Anyway I need to get back on track with the purpose of this posting. This year I do have some resolutions and they seem more obtainable then the others. So here they are and feel free to comment on them or maybe leave your own.....

This year I resolve to......

Enjoy everyday, one day at a time
Be easier on myself
Be thankful
Relax
Appreciate what I have
Stay focused on the present
Call home at least once a week
Smile more
SLEEP MORE
Forgive and move on

Well I know these are unusual resolutions but.... they are mine and I don't think I will break these promises. Only time will tell.


HAPPY NEW YEAR!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Thankful

I once went to a psychic and she said, that I have to learn to say thank you when I am given compliments or something nice (this was among other things that she said, which we will get into at a later time). It has taken me a very long time to appreciate those situations, you know the ones that deserve a thanks.

At one time in my life I would wake up and as soon as I did so I would say "thank you for another day" but, due to some dark times in my life I found those days few and far between. In fact, I haven't done it in I don't remember how long. During these times I felt that I had nothing to be thankful for, the common statement became "why?"as in "why another day". Well, I may not know the answer to that but, I do know that it is out there.

So, now I can say "thank you for....."

another day
waking up and being happy
my family
the friends I have
the fact that I am here to feel anything at all
the strength I have found that I never thought I had
and most importantly ......just being ALIVE!!!!!!!

I don't know how I made it.....I certainly wasn't looking out for myself during this darkness, but somebody was.......THANK YOU!!!!!!!!!!!!

Another Year Comes to an End

As I reflect on yet another year passing all I can say is WOW! Life has definitely thrown many of us (including me) a few curve balls this year. But I can honestly say that I have survived....a little bruised and scratched up but I am still standing. Maybe stronger now then ever before.

We all have been told what doesn't kill us makes us stronger well I am a new believer in that one.

I have been blessed this year to have a tight knit support group.....including those that are new members. Without all of them I don't think I would be here or at least as strong as I am.

I have done some crazy things this year and as I look back I can honestly say I don't regret one bit of it. One of my fondest memories was being a part of my friend's wedding, just thinking about it makes me smile. There are others like Jaide, my baby girl, and meeting new people and developing lasting relationships with them.

The saddest parts I have to deal with slowly and carefully. I am healing though and that makes it better. I watched my best friend go through a really hard time and there wasn't anything I could do to help her. I lost what I thought was the love of my life, believe me that was the hardest, but again I made it.

I moved.....moved way across the country and started over. I have made new friends here and enjoy the ones that I had. I am finally getting control of my life and having to answer to one person for the craziness I bring into my life guess who that is......ME!

So here is to saying goodbye to another year however trying and hard it was. I am still standing and looking forward to next year.